Sunday, March 22, 2009

I've Had Enough Nightmares For Now, Thanks...

So I'm struggling to remember it all
Like I do with all my dreams
Though usually the bad ones stick
And the good ones fade it seems...
But last night and the night before
I tossed and turned and stirred
While terror filled my sleeping mind
The way a cage contains a bird...


That didn't start with the intention to be in rhyme and it kinda came out that way... Whoops... Anyway, this is what my dreams were about...

Friday night, at staff dinner before room checks, Amanda C. and Judd were having a conversation about how there were supposedly gang shootings going on in Wal-Marts... Apparently, this stuck in my brain, because that's what I dreamed about that night.  Only instead of a shooting, it was an all out war zone... 

The only things I remember:  Andrew (an RA) attacking someone with a plastic toy archery set.  I remember that I attacked someone with a toy knife.  I think Andrew and I were protecting some little kid, but I can't remember.  I also remember being on a bus with a lot of other people who had been in this war... I remember cutting someone's legs with a little serated piece of metal (I think it was the piece of metal from the rolls of packaging tape... Andrew had broken the tape dispenser earlier that evening while we were doing room checks) but the weird thing about it was, his legs were bleeding in rainbow colors... and also, bleeding like his legs were underwater... (That's the best way I can explain it... the colors danced off his legs, but he was definitely bleeding) 

That's all I really remember from Friday night's dream...

Last night I dreamed that I work at the same place I do now, only it didn't look the same.  We were here for the summer, and there were all these little kids here.  It was myself, Dan and Amanda (my bosses) and one other RA, Andrew.  (Who seems to be in a lot of these nightmares)  We were near the water, and little kids were swimming, while the adults took them across the water to visit a "haunted house."  

I had had an incident with one of my residents (even though I know the girl in my dream wasn't a resident...) Who kept yelling and calling me a racist... which was frustrating, because in my dream, all I was trying to do was save everyone, because so many girls had already gone missing.  So I managed to stop all my girls from going into the water, but I don't remember how...

The whole time, I'm trying to get everyone out of the water, and trying to convince them not to go over to the house.  Two little kids break away from the group, and have crossed the water to the bank on the far side, where the house is.  They are up in trees.  Kyle (one of the RHDs from another building) climbed the tree to get the little boy down, and the little girl got rescued by someone else I don't remember...

So I'm holding these two little kids, one on each side of me, and I go back to sit down where Dan is.  I remember crossing the water, that they were squeezing my sides really tight with their legs to hold themselves up... There was this... porch type thing... Almost like little gazebos, jutting out over the water, but they were retractable.  (Sort of like bleachers in a high school gym) When I walked over, it was just a single bench, where Dan was sitting, leaned back against the bench, arms outstreched, with his right leg crossed over the left... in khaki cargo pants and the olive green sweater he wears...  (I remember this vividly, because usually I know when I'm dreaming, and this was one of those little things that made me doubt, because it was realistic)  This mother came by, who was leading a group of the little kids to go across to see the haunted house.  Andrew had joined us by that point as well (and was wearing khaki shorts, a blue zip-up hoodie and his hat... another one of those things that messed with reality)

 I'm arguing with this mother, telling her not to take the kids across, when finally, the woman just yells something about me holding onto those disgusting things, and who do I think I am?  Dan just looks at me and says, "Amanda, these kids are dead..." and when I looked down, they were rotting in my arms... So I kept saying, "No, they were fine... they were fine just a second ago." But now that I think about it, I hadn't felt them for awhile... So Dan took them away from me, like he was sorry about it... And the lady kept insisting that she was taking the kids to the house.

I'm not sure how this happened next, but one little girl fell in, the other jumped in after her, and then a third kid got sucked in... So Andrew dove in to save the first little girl, the mother jumped in, and I dove across the water to the third kid.  I want to say that Andrew came up with 2 kids and the mother grabbed the third by the collar, because when I jumped into the water, something grabbed my hand (not a kid) and wouldn't let go.  In the process of dragging the kids out, a panel got knocked loose from the bleacher/porch thing, and rats came scurrying out... Dozens of rats... Which died almost immediately afterward...

I finally got out of the water, and went over by Dan.  I said, "Okay, I don't want to scare anyone... But kids, I just want to say that I'm a little scared of that house over there too, and I don't wanna go.  If any of want to, I don't want to take that away from you, so you can go with the chaperone.  But I'm gonna sit right here with Dan, and if you want to stay with me, you can."

A handful of kids proceeded to come sit beside me and Dan, and Dan started telling the woman the house really was haunted.  And she scoffed at him, but he said (with a slight stutter... again, messing with reality) "And t-t-t-that's fine..." that she could believe what she wanted, but she hadn't been looking out the back windows of Olson (one of the halls I'm RA in) and seeing that house all semester.  He told us that it was the most haunted location in the country...

And then we heard screaming coming from the house... At first it was just the little yells kids give off when you frighten them, but then they turned into long, very very real shrieks of panic and terror.  The rest of the kids moved to sit with Dan and I.  

I don't remember what happened next, except I woke up in the room I'm in now.  I checked my phone, and there was a picture message from Amanda (my boss) from the house, saying how cool it was.  (So she must've been in the first group that went through)  The walls, I remember, were very very bright green.  I was afraid to look at the pictures.  

I thought I was really awake at this point, because in my dream, I went to my laptop and turned some music on iTunes... Which started wailing at me... Then I realized it was a dream, and I woke myself up.


1 comment:

kellerie said...

you really need some time to relax and not have responsibility.

you also need to figure out what the haunted house represents. what are you terrified of that you need to protect others from?