More than a Friend

This is just a quick post

Because I seriously have to go to sleep

I just wanted to say that

I       LOVE       LEGWARMERS

Like... more than a friend.

And I think I'll be rocking them more often.

Go out and get yourself a pair!

A Busy, Lovely Weekend

So this past weekend, 

I decided that I was going home.

And I did.  And it was fabulous.

I got home Saturday evening, 

And first, Jess and I went shopping.

Crocker Park still had Christmas decorations up

And this made me very happy,

Because I love their giant Christmas tree.

And we looked around and I bought a few things.

Then after, we went a few other places

And at one store, I ran into Jeffrey!

I used to work with Jeffrey at McDonalds

And it's been ages since I've seen him

I didn't even recognize him at first,

But then, gasp! I realized who it was!

And I got a great big hug from him

Two hugs, actually!!! : )

And then I went back to Jess's

And we watched Mallrats, 

Which I had never seen

And was actually very very funny.

Then, on Sunday, 

I got to see Celia and T.J.

And I gave them their Christmas gifts.

T.J. is getting so big!

And he was absolutely adorable

I got him a fishbowl with rattly fish

And it lights up and plays music...

I got some fantastically precious pictures

Of him trying to stick his whole head in the bowl.

Sunday I also went to see Nikki

And we went out shopping as well...

Really, we just browsed a little bit

And then we watched Tiny Toons at home

But it was relaxing, and nice

Monday, I went to the high school, 

And I was a guest speaker for Publications

Not only was it wonderful to see Pancat,

Who I missed terribly 

(And if she's reading this, remember, Coventry! Soon!)

But I got to tell the students all about my college experience

And they're writing articles about my speech.

I can't wait to read them!!!

But it was weird too, 

Because it made me feel a thousand years old

And about a million years removed from them all

I mean, a few knew me

But all the kids that didn't were kind of... distant

And that's really different for me

Either way, it was awesome, and I'm glad I did it.

Then, I came back to Kent.

And went out to the Interbelt.

Aaron was one of the other RAs on my staff

He was my duty partner, but

He's going to Tennessee for an internship this semester

And Monday was my last night to see him.

So, I went to the Interbelt

Because Aaron is my club buddy

And I love going dancing with him

I met Aaron, Paul, Derek, and Michael there

And it was a blast!

I mean, there were dull moments, 

But I have never seen the place so packed before

And when "Circus" by Britney Spears came on,

It was like a scene from a movie or something...

Because the music was loud, 

The lights were streaming

And I was right in the middle of it

Really, REALLY there in the middle of it,

Laughing and dancing and just being really happy

To be there with the boys 

And not caring about people looking at me

And then I got lost coming back, 

And I accidentally ran over a cat...

I felt really bad

But looking back now, I almost forgot that part

Because I really did have a wonderful time

And I'm really going to miss Aaron,

But I'm so proud of him and excited for his opportunity.

I just wanted to write about my weekend.

Hope yours was as lovely as mine

And involves less vehicular homicide...

Peace out, Girl Scout!

New Year, New Start

Well, this is the first post of the new year.

I'll take a few minutes to sum up the end of 2008.

It was a doozy...

I managed to back into a car in the parking lot here.

It was the girl from accounting... 

Luckily, it didn't really do anything to her car.

It cracked the back bumper of mine.

I took cookies to my friend Tom on Christmas Eve.

That was exciting, because I hadn't seen him in years

And I'd forgotten how awesome he is.

I got to go look at Christmas lights

With Jess, because he was the only one that could

Also, that night, I managed to back into something else.

Jess's Aunt Mary's mailbox...

Which annihilated the mailbox, and only further damaged my back bumper.

Then, I went to Nikki's house, where we watched Robot Chicken

And then went to bed.

Christmas morning was lovely.

I got Horton Hears a Who 

A Taylor Swift CD,

And a raquetball set from "Santa"

And then from Brittany and Aud, 

I got The Dark Knight, Redvines and a gift card.

I got to visit with Jess again that day,

And we went to see a movie, Yes Man

Which was very very funny.

Since then, I came back to Kent State

And continued to work.  

I spent New Years with Katie, Sabina and Jerry

And it was a blast!

We played games and watched the ball drop...

So this is the first day of 2009

And I've just lounged around all day...

So now, I'm sitting here in a bathrobe,

Watching the Looney Tunes marathon that's on Cartoon Central.

I hope your 2009 is going well!

Final Book Count for 2008

JANUARY
-MY SWEET AUDRINA BY V.C. ANDREWS
-FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC BY V.C. ANDREWS
-PETALS ON THE WIND BY V.C. ANDREWS
-SO FAR FROM HOME: THE DIARY OF MARY DRISCOLL, AN IRISH MILL GIRL, LOWELL, MASSACHUSETTS, 1847 BY BARRY DENENBERG
-VOYAGE ON THE GREAT TITANIC: THE DIARY OF MARGARET ANN BRADY, R.M.S. TITANIC, 1912 BY ELLEN EMERSON WHITE
-VICTORIA: MAY BLOSSOM OF BRITTANIA; ENGLAND, 1829 BY ANNA KIRWAN

FEBRUARY
-ELEANOR: CROWN JEWEL OF AQUITAINE; FRANCE, 1136 BY KRISTIANA GREGORY
-A RAISIN IN THE SUN BY LORRAINE HANSBERRY
-BRAVE NEW WORLD BY ALDOUS HUXLEY

MARCH
-THE GREAT GILLY HOPKINS BY KATHERINE PATERSON

APRIL
-HATCHET BY GARY PAULSEN
-ERAGON BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLINI
-ELDEST BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLINI

MAY
-NOTHING'S SACRED BY LEWIS BLACK
-SECRETS IN THE ATTIC BY V.C. ANDREWS

JUNE
-THE HALLOWEEN TREE BY RAY BRADBURY
-SNAIL MAIL NO MORE BY PAULA DANZINGER & ANN M. MARTIN
-STARGIRL BY JERRY SPINELLI
-EPONINE BY T. JAMES BELICH (PLAY)
-CLASS CLOWN BY JOHANNA HURWITZ
-QUIVERS; A LIFE BY ROBIN QUIVERS

JULY
-APRIL SHADOWS BY V.C. ANDREWS
-ISABEL: JEWEL OF CASTILLA; SPAIN, 1466 BY CAROLYN MEYER
-WHERE HAVE ALL THE FLOWERS GONE?: THE DIARY OF MOLLY MACKENZIE FLAHERTY BY ELLEN EMERSON WHITE
-GIRL IN THE SHADOWS BY V.C. ANDREWS
-BROKEN FLOWER BY V.C. ANDREWS

AUGUST
-THE KITE RUNNER BY KHALED HOSSEINI
-FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC BY V.C. ANDREWS (AGAIN)

SEPTEMBER

-HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS BY J.K. ROWLING

-THE LESSON BY EUGENE IONESCO (PLAY) {I'VE READ THIS ABOUT A BILLION TIMES NOW}

-BRISINGR BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLINI

OCTOBER

-IT BY STEPHEN KING

NOVEMBER

-I DIDN'T READ ANYTHING IN NOVEMBER... I KNOW, I'M DISAPPOINTED IN ME TOO...

DECEMBER

-THE NEVERENDING STORY BY MICHAEL ENDE

-THE PIGMAN BY PAUL ZINDEL

-THE PIGMAN'S LEGACY BY PAUL ZINDEL

final count for 2008: 35 books.  I'm a little disappointed... i'm trying for more next year!

Quick Post...

Well, Christmas is over

And it was painless...

I still have a few people to visit

I didn't get to see Celia and T.J.

But I'm going to try and do that

A little after the New Year.

This is just a quick post

Because it's 10 till 6

And I have to leave 

I'm going to a concert 

In Massilon...

Jason's band is playing

And I said that I would go.

I'm excited!

More about break later...

In the New Room

I'm all settled in for Winter Break...

Well... mostly.

I still need to put the Christmas tree back up

But other than that, 

I'm all settled.  

Tonight, I went out for dinner

With Gerry and Allison,

Two of the other winter RAs

And I'm really excited for this year

Because it's not cliquey like it was last year

We all get along

And we can tell our RA horror stories 

And laugh together

And I like it a lot...

I'm in Centennial C for break

Which is a very nice room

But not as big as my other room

And I miss my bathtub

But the carpeting is nice

And being able to control the heat is nice too

Plus, I'm right beside the laundry room

So later tonight, I'm doing a major clothes-washing...

For now, I have to go...

Time for 8:00 rounds!

2:00 A.M. Catharsis...

Okay... so I know this is going to be melodramatic...
I actually sort of intend it to be...
It's somewhat cathartic... 
A purging of sorts... 

It's just... 
I'd like to think someone listens
But if I write it all out like this
Then only the people that WANT to listen can
So if you don't want to deal with my drama
Then please, 
Stop reading here.
I wouldn't want you to be inconvenienced any further.

Last week, someone called me "fuckin ugly"
In all my life, I've never been called that
And I've been called a lot of things
I've even had someone tell me to kill myself
But never has someone said that to me
And I laughed it off, but honestly
It hurt a lot... 
And I needed to say that.

I just found out that one of my friends...
A father figure really
Is very sick...
And I don't quite know how to process that yet
Because I'm really shaken up about it
And I guess that's all I can even really say about it
Because I don't know how to feel
Or what to do, or say...

The person that I used to be closest to
Is pushing me out of their life
Entirely, from the look of it.
And I don't want to be a burden
So I'm just going to let it happen
And hope that someday soon
She'll realize I only want to be there for her...
And maybe she'll realize too
That this really, really hurts me
Only I'm not going to say anything more.

Then, there's this guy
Who makes me smile all the time
Even when he isn't trying to
Except I want to believe he is trying to...
There are a bazillion things I could say here
But I won't... for a few reasons
I don't want to give too much away
Because I never say anything
When it comes to boys...
Because wanna know a secret?

I've never actually been on a date...
I mean, I had a boyfriend
But we were always just... together
I've never actually dated
And I'm disappointed in this...

But for once,
I want to be a better person
I want to be happier and healthier
And I want to work harder to be better
But not perfect. 
I finally figured out I'm never going to be
And someone WILL pick me, just for me.

Tonight was a pretty weather night.
The snow was light on the ground
It was cold, but not windy...
And the flakes that fell were the happy, fluffy kind
That you can catch on your tongue. 
It's the kind of snow that falls lightly into your hair
Or into your face,
Waiting for a kind hand to brush it away. 

It's the kind of snow that makes me want to hold someone
To hug someone and tell them
That everything will be okay
Even if it isn't right now. 
It was the kind of snow that I wish I had memories of...
Of someone coming up to me, 
Taking me by the hand
And telling me that it's okay to feel happy and sad at the same time
And that it's enough to just be feeling with my whole heart

I want it to be one of those movie moments...
Where I'm standing there, staring at the snow
And I hear someone come up behind me
But as I turn to see who it is, 
I'm already in his arms
And I'm seeing the snow fall into his hair...
Getting stuck in his eyelashes
Watching how his eyes sparkle
And his whole face lights up when he smiles...

I know it's dorky sounding
But to me, it sounds... 
It sounds right and soft and wonderful
Like it's what I've always wanted
And one day, I'll get it. 

Even though I didn't sleep much last night, 
I'm so very, very awake right now...
Because I'd be disappointed to fall asleep
And not dream about the things I just said.

So if you listened this far, thank you. 
Because it means a lot that you're listening.