What Does a Dream Really Mean Anyway?

I've been having a lot of bad dreams lately... Not scary like monsters, but scary like it was just too real. This morning I woke up in a panic, because I was dreaming that I was back home. I was caught in the middle of another argument, and my parents were just screaming at each other... Their dream fight was up there with the worst they've ever had. It's been a long time since I've witnessed one of these fights, but it was frightening just how much the dream really scared me. It felt very, very real.

Thursday night, Jon spent the night. I woke up forty-five minutes before my alarm in a complete panic, and jumped onto him on his side of the bed, clinging onto him like I was drowning. I felt really bad, because I really scared Jon, but I needed to know he was there, and that this was what was real.

I had dreamed that I was back home in the shopping center, and Jon and I were in the car with some people I knew when I was a kid. I was looking for my bag in the trunk and the backseat, and I guess I wasn't moving fast enough, because dream-Jon freaked out and started yelling at me and throwing things from the car and trunk. Dream-me acted predictably, and cried and walked away. One of the other people in the dream walked with me and said something about him being crazy, and how he wouldn't even party with him because he was scary-crazy when he drank. Dream-me said that Jon didn't drink, and the other guy in the dream looked at me like I was fooling myself.

Then Dream-me walked over to Dream-Jon, and he kept yelling, but we were staring to talk through it. Suddenly, this man walked up to Dream-Jon, and asked for drugs. Dream-Jon was a dealer, he just gave me this look... like he was sorry but I should have known better, and he said, "Don't act like you didn't see it." Then Dream-me was scrambling to pick up the things he'd thrown on the ground, like my purse, and sweatshirt and television remote. (the items don't make sense, but I could see them so clearly... down to tears on the sweatshirt and stuff like that)

It was about then that I woke up and freaked out. I woke up crying because it felt so real. Jon just hugged me until I calmed down, which I appreciated, but when he asked me about the dream and I explained it, he seemed mad at himself. He thinks it's his fault because he had a cigarette with his coworkers and told me about it. (He's mostly quit, but has slip-ups often)

So that's been my last few days.